


A Lifetime Ago

by Oh_Toasty



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Auschwitz, Holocaust, Holocaust survivor Merlin, Immortal Merlin, Kind of dark, M/M, Nazis, Pink Triangle, WWII, gas chambers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-03
Updated: 2015-07-03
Packaged: 2018-04-07 12:10:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,204
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4262802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Oh_Toasty/pseuds/Oh_Toasty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Merlin finds himself triggered and reliving his time in Auschwitz.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Lifetime Ago

When his friends invited him to a club, Merlin agreed. He'd never been to one before despite how long he had been alive; he'd never felt the urge to go to one. However since Arthur and Gwaine had asked him to he would go. 

Gwaine got to the apartment he shared with Arthur to pick them up at seven thirty. After saying their greetings Merlin was ushered into the car in the pretext that Gwen, Morgana, and the rest of the guys were waiting for them. Laughingly, Merlin obeyed and they began the drive to club. 

Upon entry the other men headed straight for the bar tugging Merlin along with them. He sat besides Leon, who he knew was the other car's designated driver, figuring that if they couldn't drink they could at least talk. 

He never got the chance to, instead Morgana grabbed a hold of his arm and dragged him to the center of the dance floor. He froze at the sensation of so many bodies pressed against his and struggled to remind himself where he was. You're in London England, he thought, not Nazi Germany. 

"Come on," Morgana said, "Put your arms up!"

Those words ripped away any control Merlin had and suddenly he was back in Auschwitz. 

He was working on leveling the road and keeping his eyes down when he felt a heavy gaze upon n his chest. Peaking up from beneath his eyelashes, Merlin saw the heavy set Nazi who was glaring at the pink triangle sewed into his uniform. 

No, Merlin thought, please don't focus on me. 

It was to late, the Nazi stood forwards and pushed Merlin roughly. As Merlin lay splayed on the floor the Nazi slammed his foot down on his hand and grinded until he felt bones snap. 

"Looks like you need to go to Medical," the man sneered and Merlin's eyes closed as he held back tears. He couldn't use magic to heal himself or they would run experiments on him. Instead he sat back and allowed them to escort him to medical where he knew exactly what would happen. 

He was right, the man in medical laid eyes on the pink triangle on his shirt and then on his mangled hand and declared him unfit for work. 

"Fortunately, we just got in a new bunch of workers so we can get rid of him today," the doctor continued. 

The Nazi who had crushed his hand grinned as he escorted him to the crowd of people waiting outside of the gas chambers. Merlin was ordered to strip out of his clothes an he did so slowly still fighting tears. He knew that the gas in the chambers wouldn't kill him, couldn't kill him, but there was nothing he could do to save the other men and women going in with him. 

Then he was town from his thoughts by a harsh voice, "Put your arms up and walk in!"

Shivering Merlin obeyed lifting his arms above his head. He debated taking them down so that there was less room in the chamber and he could save at least one child but he knew it was hopeless. Instead Merlin walked into the chamber. 

He tried to ignore the feel of hundreds of bodies all cramped together but it was impossible. Then it began, the gas came into the room and people began to cough and choke. He fell to the ground along with the rest of them and pretended that he was dead also. 

As the Nazis pulled their bodies to the crematoria Merlin furiously held back tears. It wasn't fair, this shouldn't have happened. Surely this was Albion's darkest times, so where was Arthur. 

Merlin cut off that thought as he felt himself be thrown into a pile of corpses. Cautiously Merlin opened his eyes. Upon seeing that the Nazis were completely ignoring the bodies Merlin crawled away. He got to the fence unseen and whispered a spell that melted away a piece. As soon as the hole was big enough Merlin crawled through it and made his escape. Even miles away from the camp he could still feel the press of those dying men against his body. 

"Merlin, Merlin" he heard a deep voice say. "Come on wake up now."

"Jesus Morgana, what did you do to him?" Another voice said and Merlin struggled to place it. 

"Nothing!" A girl called out, "I just took him out onto the dance floor."

"It doesn't matter now," the deep voice sighed and Merlin felt a jolt of shock. That was Arthur, but how? Then it all rushed back to him, it was 2015 and he had just had a panic attack on the dance floor. 

A groan passed through his lips and Gwen shushed everyone saying, "He's waking up."

Slowly Merlin allowed his eyes to flicker open and squinted as he was met with the grey roof of Gwaine's car. He sat up slowly with the help of Arthur's hand on his back and asked,"How did I get in here?"

"I carried you," Arthur replied his eyes searching Merlin; he knew who Merlin really was, he had been the only one to regain memories from his past life. 

"Oh," he answered quietly not knowing what else to say; he couldn't exactly tell his twenty two year old friends that he'd been having flashbacks to World War II. 

"What the hell was that?" Morgana demanded and Merlin winced. 

"Nothing," He said despite knowing this would only infuriate Morgana. 

He was right, she exploded, "Nothing! What the hell do you mean, nothing? You just collapsed and looked like you were about to have a bloody seizure."

"It was nothing," Merlin insisted. 

"You know we can just ask Gaius? So why don't you just tell us?" Gwen pleaded. 

Merlin was unable hold in his snort at that. As much as he loved Gaius in this time period he knew nothing. Sure he may suspect that there was something different about him but that was all there was. When he met Gaius he had been working in a bookstore and had Gaius tell Uther Pendragon that he planned to adopt a child about the same age as Arthur, six years old. That very same same day he had handed his lease over to a friend and changed to a little boy who showed up at the orphanage that Gaius had mentioned. To Gaius Merlin was just his son and had never experienced anything that could cause a panic attack like that. 

"Look, it doesn't matter." Merlin said "Let's just go home."

"Whatever," Morgana muttered stalking away. Gwen and Leon gave quick fair wells before running after her to ensure they weren't left behind. 

Quietly the remaining men loaded into Gwaine's car and began the trip back towards the flat. Upon their arrival, before Merlin could step out Gwaine said, "You know mate whenever you're ready you can tell me."

"Thank you," Merlin said before he left the confine of the vehicle. Then reached out to take Arthur's hand saying, "but I'll be okay."

That night was spent with Merlin telling Arthur what the club had triggered and Arthur trying to hug away all of Merlin's pain.


End file.
